Why I’m Setting Intentions for 2023, Not Resolutions

January 1, it’s the start of a brand new month and a brand new year. It marks the end of a chaotic holiday season, and most of us welcome it as a time to reset and “get back on track.” I look forward to it for similar reasons, but this year I’m approaching resolutions a little differently.

Resolutions are notorious for being broken. Whether they’re broken in January or March, they rarely, in my experience, last forever. And they almost always are some strict reaction to something that happened over the holidays. Overindulged on holiday goodies? Come January 1, I’m giving up sugar and carbs. Exercised less? I’m getting up at 5am and working out 7 days a week. There’s no room for flexibility in these types of resolutions. It’s an all or nothing, black & white approach, and when we can’t do it or we think we messed up part of it, we feel like a complete failure, and then we just give up entirely.

Instead, I’m approaching my “resolutions” as intentions and long-term goals. These are marathons, not sprints. I want to take the time to build a foundation around these, so when life happens and I hit a bump (because that will happen) I have confidence that I can get back to it.

The areas that I want to work on and improve are things I’ve been thinking about for months, but were definitely magnified over the holidays. I plan on taking small steps, building as I go and tweaking as necessary. If something isn’t working, I’m not going to force it. I’ll take a step back, figure out what needs adjusting and try again. I have no expectation of perfection for any of my intentions, just improvement. My overarching hope is that by the end of this year, I will have formed some new habits that maybe I can build on even more in 2024!

If you’re interested in my goals, feel free to keep reading. If not, I wish you all the best in your 2023 intentions!

My 2023 Intentions

Intentions #1 & #2: Incorporating Purposeful Movement & Purposeful Relaxation

These are really two separate intentions, but they’re similar enough to be grouped together. They are also my biggest intentions for this year. There are different definitions of purposeful movement; for me, it’s a more intentional way of moving my body and exercising, beyond chasing my kids or cleaning my house. I may still say, “I’m going to go work out,” but in my mind, rephrasing it to purposeful movement turns it into a very intentional, conscious choice about what, when and why.

I’ve really come to love outdoor walks in my neighborhood, as well as mixing in lifting routines. I could go into the science behind the importance of cardio and weight lifting, but basically, that saying of “use it or lose it” is actually quite accurate. In addition, I feel stronger, healthier, mentally clearer, more focused, more energetic, I sleep better, the list goes on and on.

Similarly, purposeful relaxation is an intentional way of allowing my mind and body to unwind. Yoga and meditation are great examples of this. Others may include warm baths, catching up with a friend, going for a leisurely stroll or making a cup of tea and picking up a book. These are different from mindlessly scrolling social media or having a glass of wine and bingeing Netflix. I do those things too, but there’s more intentionality behind purposeful relaxation. Particularly in yoga or meditation, breath work and mental focus have benefits that resonate throughout the whole body.

Unfortunately over the years, both of these areas have been put on the back burner. But this year, they’re coming to the front again. I’ve been practicing yoga off and on and working out long enough to know that I’m most successful if I get a workout in first thing in the morning. I also know that if I’m going to take my kids with me, it needs to be after breakfast. So I’ll start by scheduling these in each week based on what we have going on, and the weather. If I know it’s going to be snowing or miserable (or in the summer, super hot or rainy), I’ll plan on that day either being a weight lifting day or a yoga day. I’ll save the outdoor walks for when the weather is at least tolerable. I have zero expectation that these will happen everyday. Maybe by the end of the year they will, but right now I’m aiming for a few times a week, fully knowing and anticipating that there will be weeks where it doesn’t happen at all. I won’t beat myself up over it, life happens. But if I can get a solid foundation started, it makes it that much easier to come back to it.

Intention #3: Adding More Variety to Our Diet

Overall we eat pretty well. However, I’m finding we gravitate to the same foods for all of our meals and snacks. Part of this is convenience. Breakfast was becoming a power struggle between my son & I, so I came up with a theme for each day, and within that theme he has some choice (i.e., for Toast Tuesday, does he want avocado toast or peanut butter toast; for Waffle Wednesday, what fruit does he want on the side; for Egg in a Hole Saturday, does he want sourdough or wheat bread). Originally Mondays were Muffin Mondays, but that wasn’t working out so well, so we’ve changed it to Mix-It-Up Monday. This gives us a little flexibility to work in new foods, leftovers, or just something we aren’t already having during the week. Plus, my son inadvertently came up with the name, so he already has buy in!

I’m not too worried about lunch, but dinners could use a little more variety, as could snacks. So my intention for this goal is to include one new food per week. The first one was purple sweet potatoes. We used to have them more frequently, but haven’t had them in months, if not years. My kids love orange sweet potatoes, we have them about once a week, so I figured this would be an easy one to start with. It’s quasi-familiar, but a new color and a slightly different flavor. If I’m anticipating a busy week, I may bring variety in by simply cutting a vegetable differently. We use this crinkle cutter a lot to make fries, so I may cube a potato instead.

I’ll build on this as we go; my ultimate goal is to be able to include more than one new food per week. What that number is exactly, I don’t know, but more than 1 😉 .

Intention #4: Getting Back to My Bedtime Routine

This is such an underrated tip for better sleep. A bedtime routine is such a key part of preparing our bodies and minds for restful sleep. I had a great bedtime routine for months, but like a lot of things, it’s gotten away from me. This was my routine, and I’ve been working on getting back to it, without really changing too much:

6:30/7p: once kids are down, change into pajamas, get bed ready (remove pillows, etc), turn on electric blanket (in winter), take nighttime supplements. If I’m fighting a cold or am sick, fill up humidifier.

7-8:30/9p: make chamomile or sleepy time tea, and veg out with hubby, watch TV, do a little last minute work.

9p: all electronics off, set alarm and put phone on Do Not Disturb. Depending on the night, I may even shut Bluetooth & wireless off. Brush teeth, wash face, get in bed.

9-9:30p: read an actual book, not on a device. I use a book light set to yellow light and read until my eyes are super heavy or until 9:30, whichever happens first. Lights out at 9:30 and mentally go through a list of the things I am grateful for until I fall asleep.

I notice a remarkable difference when I follow this routine. I fall asleep faster, I sleep better and I wake up more refreshed.

Intention #5: Staying Hydrated

I can’t stress enough the importance of proper hydration for overall health. We can survive weeks, maybe even months, without food, but only three days without water. That is how vital it is to our bodies. Staying hydrated is important when we feel healthy, and it’s extremely important when we’re sick or fighting something off. Everything from our skin and hair, to our GI, down to our cells need water to survive and thrive. After I had my daughter, I had severely dry skin, so I really became very intentional about drinking more water, and thankfully, that habit has stuck, so I’m just focusing on keeping it going. I’m most successful when I mix it up throughout the day: I start most mornings with lemon water, and then continue with electrolytes, herbal tea and plain water. Yes, you’ll need to pee, but that’s the point 😉 . I also find that using a stainless steel or glass water bottle makes drinking water more enticing. I don’t know why, but it does. It’s also easier to grab if I’m running an errand or heading outside with the kids!

Intention #6: The Great House Clean Out

I said intentions #1 and #2 are my biggest resolutions, but that may actually be a lie. This is probably my biggest intention of 2023: purging our house of anything and everything we do. not. need. We have a lot of “we’ll get to it later” piles around our house, especially in our basement, and I just can’t take it anymore. This was magnified 10 fold over the holidays, when we got a (generous) influx of toys and gifts for our kids. I set an intention to tackle every room, every closet, every drawer and any other nook and cranny that might have something in it. I am not overthinking any of it. Do we use it everyday? Then keep. Do we use it occasionally? Maybe we can move it somewhere else (and by December, if it hasn’t been used, it’s gone). Haven’t used it in a year or have no idea what it is or where it came from? Bye-bye!!! I’ve already tackled a few cabinets and drawers in our kitchen, and I feel a weight lifted off of my shoulders. I’ve also cleaned out my sweaters and the kids’ summer clothes, and I can literally breathe deeper. The key for me, especially with this one, is knowing this is going to be a year-long process. I’m doing a little at a time, strategizing what and when I do it, taking care of low hanging fruit first, and just keeping it moving. Do I wish I could snap my fingers and it would be done? Yes, 100%. But I recognize how unrealistic that is, and have accepted that I’ll have to do this in small, incremental steps, otherwise I will get very overwhelmed and burnt out, and then none of it will get done. As I write this, it’s been a few days since I purged anything, so over the weekend I’ll pick another couple of (easy) things, and then I’ll time block into my calendar some more substantial time next week to tackle one or two bigger areas (like my kids’ closets while they’re at school 😬).

Slow & steady folks, that’s the name of the game!